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Am I asking too much of friends?

Old 05-21-2012, 08:08 PM
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Default Am I asking too much of friends?

So i went out and got a "new to me" 03 Sea Hunt Triton 232. Ive dumped about $6-9 grand into electronics and accessories to improve and update its performance and quality. Ive expressed that i would like to learn how to fish in the gulf to a few friends of mine. I've mostly stuck to lakes and ponds my whole life. anyways. I took a few buddies out 2 weeks ago and didn't ask of a dime. one friend mentioned making me up some good leaders as a thank you but never made good on it. the other simply thanked me and that was that. i spent probably $60-75 for a 4 hour fishing trip all out of my own pocket and we ended up only pulling up some ladyfish and a couple blues. these same buddies have expressed interest in going for an all out fishing trip starting in the early morning and doing some hard core fishing. I mentioned the fact that i don't have the extra cash to just be giving out free tours of the Gulf. I told them what i would like to do is calculate the gas consumption coupled with the price of bait, ice, drinks, etc. and split it between us. obviously more people means cheaper rates. well, one guy said " so your going to charge me to go on your boat?" i told them all i was more than happy to take them but.....i need some help covering expenses. so. what do y'all do in this situation? i mean, it cost so much more than what they see. i drive 30 miles from Crestview Fl to Eglin AFB in Ft. Walton Beach Fl just to launch. it costs roughly $18 round trip just to get the boat to the launch. then I'm around 5 miles to the destine pass, and then they wanna go 15 miles off shore. is this just a casualty of owning a boat? is it the norm to become someones personal charter? somehow i think not but there are a couple guys that would gladly go and not offer up a penny if i didn't mention the strain. let me know what y'all think. thanks.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:15 PM
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Two very adamant sides to this. I belong to the side that says I pay for the boat, insurance, maintenance, tackle, etc so the people that go with me should chip in for gas and help clean up the boat. I'm not made of money and I'm not a charter....
Sounds like you should find new fishing buddies.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:20 PM
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Originally Posted by gordo35 View Post
Two very adamant sides to this. I belong to the side that says I pay for the boat, insurance, maintenance, tackle, etc so the people that go with me should chip in for gas and help clean up the boat. I'm not made of money and I'm not a charter....
Sounds like you should find new fishing buddies.
Gordo hit on the head !
Old 05-21-2012, 08:21 PM
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I always add up all expenses and split everything evenly at the end of the day. Only ones who don't pay on my boat are women and children. If you don't like it, then you don't go.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:24 PM
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No offense intended, but if your feeling the strain on your wallet with no more than you have spent so far you might think about selling your boat and going back to Lakes and Streams. There is not one dam thing cheap about owning a boat that is suitable and safe to go offshore in. You bought a boat for your enjoyment and the boat is going offshore whether they are in it or not. Friends don't charge friends to go fishing. The flip side of that is that friends don't let there friend pick up the whole tab on anything. I have never asked a dime of the people I invite to go fishing, although if it is offered I will gladly accept. My regular crew has earned their title because they understand what is needed regularly to fish (ice, bait, fuel, food, tackle, cleaning the boat, cleaning fish, etc.)

Sucks your friends haven't realized the $$$ it's costing you for their entertainment, but hopefully they will sooner than later.

Just remember, BOAT will be, is and has always been a 4 letter word.
Bob
Old 05-21-2012, 08:24 PM
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thats what i was hoping someone would say. i found it hard for the first guy in a group of friends that decides to buy a boat become a personal charter whenever they fancied. luckily for me its not a life long group of friends. ill be standing my ground on the "chip in or stay home" stance and if they are decent enough guys they will do the right thing. i guess time will tell.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:27 PM
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If a guy does not offer to chip in an egual share. I would not let him/her back on my boat. Come down to St.pete Florida I will split the cost and give you some help on the Gulf fishing stuff.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:27 PM
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Originally Posted by steve76 View Post
I always add up all expenses and split everything evenly at the end of the day. Only ones who don't pay on my boat are women and children. If you don't like it, then you don't go.
i like that idea. i just might adopt it.

and when adding up all the expenses, you cut yourself into the pot as well right? i mean, if it costs $200 for 4 people to go out, do you only take $150 from the group right? eating the hidden costs and maintenance?
Old 05-21-2012, 08:33 PM
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The cost of the boat and maintenance are yours and yours alone. The who,what, when, why, and how much is also your decision. If your buddies aren't willing to step up, then I'd start looking for some 'new to you' fishing buddies. Money does some awfully strange things to folks, and hurt feelings can last a long time.

Bob
Old 05-21-2012, 08:41 PM
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Originally Posted by lockdownx99 View Post
i like that idea. i just might adopt it.

and when adding up all the expenses, you cut yourself into the pot as well right? i mean, if it costs $200 for 4 people to go out, do you only take $150 from the group right? eating the hidden costs and maintenance?
I do. My typical costs are $450 for fuel, $40 in oil, $50 in bait and chum. If myself and 4 others are going then we split the $540 5 ways. That's not counting the lost tackle that I usually eat the cost of and I only use top shelf terminal tackle, hooks, jigs, etc. If people are dependable and want to throw in extra $ and I enjoy their company then they move up the list of invitees. It's not necessary as I'm not looking for folks to cover my share, but it is appreciated and goes a long way in my book.

If I invite someone to fish in the Bay or just offshore or the sandbar then I cover the fuel and hope they bring me a few extra beers or some good grub.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:43 PM
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Originally Posted by King Killer View Post
No offense intended, but if your feeling the strain on your wallet with no more than you have spent so far you might think about selling your boat and going back to Lakes and Streams. There is not one dam thing cheap about owning a boat that is suitable and safe to go offshore in. You bought a boat for your enjoyment and the boat is going offshore whether they are in it or not. Friends don't charge friends to go fishing. The flip side of that is that friends don't let there friend pick up the whole tab on anything. I have never asked a dime of the people I invite to go fishing, although if it is offered I will gladly accept. My regular crew has earned their title because they understand what is needed regularly to fish (ice, bait, fuel, food, tackle, cleaning the boat, cleaning fish, etc.)

Sucks your friends haven't realized the $$$ it's costing you for their entertainment, but hopefully they will sooner than later.

Just remember, BOAT will be, is and has always been a 4 letter word.
Bob
i dont agree that i should punish my family from good times (by selling my personal toys) because i didn't budget in the price of catering to friends. that won't solve friendship issues and just sounds completely dumb. Im more than capable of paying for it and its upkeep. I'm also capable of taking it out every weekend. I'm capable but NOT willing to become a taxi to the fishing grounds every weekend just because i happened to be the one in the group to buy a boat. yes i feel a strain. i didn't say I'm skipping house payments to keep my cool points in the group however but then again, not many of us have the cash laying around to buy a 32' yellow fin.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:50 PM
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Originally Posted by gordo35 View Post
I do. My typical costs are $450 for fuel, $40 in oil, $50 in bait and chum. If myself and 4 others are going then we split the $540 5 ways. That's not counting the lost tackle that I usually eat the cost of and I only use top shelf terminal tackle, hooks, jigs, etc. If people are dependable and want to throw in extra $ and I enjoy their company then they move up the list of invitees. It's not necessary as I'm not looking for folks to cover my share, but it is appreciated and goes a long way in my book.

If I invite someone to fish in the Bay or just offshore or the sandbar then I cover the fuel and hope they bring me a few extra beers or some good grub.
i agree with this as well. i agree that if i invite them, i should be happy with their company alone. but when you have a pair of guys walking up to u every week trying to get me to agree to put something together, i think its stretching the envelop a little when it comes to customs and courtesy.

ill eat the cost of oil and other routine maintenance. i have no issues with throwing in some lures as well. maybe i should try and find new friends. When i say friend i guess they are really not "friends" per say. that are actually college class mates I've gravitated towards. we have been in the same classes for almost 6 months now so i figure i know them pretty decently.
Old 05-21-2012, 08:53 PM
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I've learned that the less you expect, the more surprised you'll be and the less annoyed you'll get as well.
When its our boat, Im going to be taking it out anyway, I ask along anyone and everyone whom I know will enjoy the experience, eat the catch and not hinder the trip. If they want to pitch in, wonderful, if they want to stay after and help clean the boat, awesome. I don't expect it, I'd be doing the same thing solo if they didn't tag along, and I know in the current economic situation, not everyone can spare the 150-250 bucks for a day of fishing offshore. I enjoy boating, fishing and the experience, and I'd much rather share it with others than solo, but I'd go solo anyway.

Now, when Im a guest on someone else's boat, as an owner, I can usually guess the cost of a trip and pony up my share plus a little extra, wear and tear, parts, etc gets expensive. I also show up with drinks, sandwiches, any extra gear (I inquire before hand) and stop to pick up a few bags of ice. I stay to help clean fish and the boat, because ideally (In an alternate universe), thats what everyone who went out with me would do.
Old 05-21-2012, 09:01 PM
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We usually fish on the Hatteras and 18kts burning 50 gph I feel asking for money for fuel is rude. My boat I pay for the gas and take care of everything. We fish live baits in west palm and they buy those ($100 a dozen times 3 dozen) and thats really it.

When I have work friends fly in to the bahamas and fish they simple just have to pay for there accomodations and flights. I invited them so no need for them to pay. Plus trolling around for a few hours and maybe an hour of running + capt. isn't to bad on my pocket.

This is just how I do things but in your case I would find some new friends, we used to live in Destin and I know there are plenty of willing to fish people who would chip in for fuel etc... any day.
Old 05-21-2012, 09:03 PM
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Originally Posted by SCSaltwater View Post
I've learned that the less you expect, the more surprised you'll be and the less annoyed you'll get as well.
When its our boat, Im going to be taking it out anyway, I ask along anyone and everyone whom I know will enjoy the experience, eat the catch and not hinder the trip. If they want to pitch in, wonderful, if they want to stay after and help clean the boat, awesome. I don't expect it, I'd be doing the same thing solo if they didn't tag along, and I know in the current economic situation, not everyone can spare the 150-250 bucks for a day of fishing offshore. I enjoy boating, fishing and the experience, and I'd much rather share it with others than solo, but I'd go solo anyway.

Now, when Im a guest on someone else's boat, as an owner, I can usually guess the cost of a trip and pony up my share plus a little extra, wear and tear, parts, etc gets expensive. I also show up with drinks, sandwiches, any extra gear (I inquire before hand) and stop to pick up a few bags of ice. I stay to help clean fish and the boat, because ideally (In an alternate universe), thats what everyone who went out with me would do.
sounds fair. i think, with my "true" friends i could keep this same perspective of "not have to ask" or " just enjoy the company and anything extra is just a bonus".

i guess i call people friends before they are actually in the circle so to speak. acquaintances is more like it. colleagues maybe. people that have very little consideration as a friend. all about the ride a very little thought about what went into it. thats all.
Old 05-21-2012, 09:04 PM
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Originally Posted by lockdownx99 View Post
i like that idea. i just might adopt it.

and when adding up all the expenses, you cut yourself into the pot as well right? i mean, if it costs $200 for 4 people to go out, do you only take $150 from the group right? eating the hidden costs and maintenance?
Roger that!
Old 05-21-2012, 09:08 PM
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if these guys didn't want to go out off shore, my boat would not be going. i don't know enough to bother going at it alone. these guys claim they are going to show me the ropes, but the last time we got out there it was every man for himself until time to head in. i didn't get one thing accomplished except standing around.
Old 05-21-2012, 09:14 PM
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Lockdown, Sending you a PM with info
Old 05-21-2012, 09:18 PM
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sounds good. just noticed you are out of Gulfport Ms. we just came from Keesler. we lived in Gautier for 4 years.
Old 05-21-2012, 09:27 PM
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Yeah, I grew up in Gulfport and fished out of there and Biloxi up until 5 years ago when we moved down here(Tampa). I've done pretty well fishing out of Destin, hopefully the info I sent will help.
Best of luck.

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