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Your intentions with my daughter?

Old 02-12-2019, 07:40 AM
  #61  
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Originally Posted by Poppin cork View Post
I knew one guy that made the guys initial a shotgun shell. I thought that was a little over the top. My parents were very strict and my mom was huge on manners. Its amazing how far a few yes sir, yes ma'ams and helping clean a plate at dinner will go with parents.

Me and my brother went out of our way to make sure parents liked us.

I only had one dad try to do the intimidation deal. It was pathetic. My dad was no joke. So his fake tough guy act was easy to see through.
It goes a long way, but its still a big ol smoke screen. All you wanna do is bang em. Then after a little of that you start thinkin maybe i'll marry this gal and bang her even more. About that time she starts thinkin about a rock on her finger and starts putting on the act of how good a wife she'll be and how good she can make your life. Then pretty soon your on the internet talkin about your younger days bangin chicks and makin her parents think we only had the best of intentions, trying to remember the last time you scored a piece of tail
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Old 02-12-2019, 07:58 AM
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Originally Posted by kawakx125 View Post
It goes a long way, but its still a big ol smoke screen. All you wanna do is bang em. Then after a little of that you start thinkin maybe i'll marry this gal and bang her even more. About that time she starts thinkin about a rock on her finger and starts putting on the act of how good a wife she'll be and how good she can make your life. Then pretty soon your on the internet talkin about your younger days bangin chicks and makin her parents think we only had the best of intentions, trying to remember the last time you scored a piece of tail
Poetry, man. Poetry.
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Old 02-12-2019, 08:03 AM
  #63  
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You can make all the threats you want..Kids gonna do what they can.. Many times the girls are just as bad as the boys...GOOD LUCK

Last edited by Cracker; 02-12-2019 at 08:46 AM.
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Old 02-12-2019, 08:08 AM
  #64  
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Be nice to the guy she brings to meet you. For every good guy you scare away there's a scumbag you'll never meet.
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Old 02-12-2019, 08:26 AM
  #65  
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So you're going to kill a guy?

If i were you I'd hope nothing happens to him.
Originally Posted by baypro21 View Post
I was never cleaning my guns when boys came by but I did make them come to the front door. When they stepped in they saw my buck on the wall. I'm pretty sure they know he didn't kill himself.

All but one acted like he was supposed to. One took my daughter to his grand parents house in Miami for a few days before a family cruise they were supposed to go on. She called her mom and was crying. I got on the phone and told her to tell him to drive her to the airport and I would have a ticket ready for her. She told me she was scared to ask that. I hung up and was knocking on the grandparents door in 4 hrs. My daughter and the boy weren't there but drove up 10 minutes later. Y'all should have seen the look on his face when he got out of his car. My daughter and I drove back to Raleigh, NC.

I'm extremely easy going and will put up with you doing me wrong. I just won't have anything to do with you anymore, doesn't bother me that much. But, I won't put up with you doing my family wrong (especially my daughter). My son in law knows I have several plans to get rid of a body if needed. I've mentioned an old well at a property I used to hunt, very remote. We were fishing once and our spot got sharked up. I mentioned this would be a good spot to dismember someone and there'd be no evidence left. LOL
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Old 02-12-2019, 08:44 AM
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I have a shotgun and a shovel nobody will miss you!
although every once in a while I meet someone that I think I wouldn't mind my daughter dating. I can tell they're good people.
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Old 02-12-2019, 09:22 AM
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Tell him " I have a Shotgun a Shovel and an Alibi "
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Old 02-12-2019, 10:04 AM
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I have always been honest with my kids. I never gave any credence to Santa, the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy. When they asked me where babies came from I gave them a factual explanation in terms a 5 year old could grasp. Sometimes they would change the subject before I could complete my answer to their questions but they would always follow up later on for more details. When my son now 19 and daughter 16 asked me a couple years ago if I ever had smoked pot, did drugs or drank before I was of age I told them the truth without allowing for many details. I let them know I do not condone the use of any illegal substances due to their inevitable destructive nature. I also told them there was no way I could follow them around and keep them from doing these things and that they would have to face the repercussions of their own decisions. Getting to the topic at hand my daughter has been with the same boy since her last year of middle school and she flat out asked me if I would be mad if she had sex with him. I let her know that at 16 she was too young for a sexual relationship but again I could not follow her around to stop it so the decision as to when was entirely up to her. I also let her know there was no need to include as to when the event takes place!
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Old 02-12-2019, 10:10 AM
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Originally Posted by MrWesson View Post
Be nice to the guy she brings to meet you. For every good guy you scare away there's a scumbag you'll never meet.
I was sitting here thinking that. The daughters are bringing them home to meet you because they're the guys they want you to meet. She's not bringing the drunken hookups that she met at some bar around 1am home to you.
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Old 02-12-2019, 10:22 AM
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I never had "that conversation" with any of my daughters boyfriends . Once my girl came to me and was very upset, she said her boyfriend wouldn't leave her alone in that department.

The next time he came over I said "COME ERE YOU!" I took him out to the back yard and told him "IF YOU TRY TO F@#K MY DAUGHTER ONE MORE TIME, I"M GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS FROM ONE END OF THIS TOWN TO THE OTHER....GOT IT?

He stood there gulping and swallowing and all he said was ... "yes sir". They broke up shortly after that.
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Old 02-12-2019, 10:38 AM
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Originally Posted by MrWesson View Post
Making your daughter feel bad for you after taking a beating from a 17 year old?

17 year old me would be the absolute shit out of 34 year old me.. Loofahs, bodywash and the suburbs don't compete with daily weightlifting, playing football, and hockey fighting.
Losing isn't an option when it comes to protecting your daughter. Also, 46 year old me would wipe the floor with 17 year old me, but then I don't use loofahs. Thanks for the tip!
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Old 02-12-2019, 12:15 PM
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Here has what has worked very well in my household: (or maybe not so well if you read below)

My daughters boyfriends know in advance..... That they are NOT allowed to address me by my first name. It will always be Mr. My Last Name. Period no discussion on this rule. No fist bumps or bro hugs either. The handshake works well in this situation.

I have taken many many and I mean many of my daughters boyfriends boating with us. I can’t think of a better way to cut through the BS, than spending a fun filled day of water sports. Some of these gentlemen I truly admired and wish my daughter had not dumped them, but heck, you can only control so much. Boating really is a great way to know your kids friends!!

So dads with daughters.... read below

My one daughter.... I caught her and her boyfriend doing the dirty deed, red handed, when she was 17, and what happened next was nothing like I had imagined all those times cleaning my gun.... The young man looked like he had just ran a marathon, just dripping in sweat! My daughter looked worse lol. When the young man, who had been on my boat at least 20 times and had gotten to the point where he felt at home raiding my fridge, saw me.... He began hyperventilating so uncontrollably, that at some point I remember putting my arm around him to hold him up while I was saying..... Just breeth Tom, Take a deep breath Tom, relax Tom, stop shaking Tom. Then I spent the next 2 hours giving the birth control speech I had been preparing for 17 years! I remember telling my wife later..... At least I won’t have to worry about that anymore.





Last edited by Barrington; 02-12-2019 at 12:24 PM. Reason: Typo
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Old 02-12-2019, 12:36 PM
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Originally Posted by Barrington View Post
Here has what has worked very well in my household: (or maybe not so well if you read below)

My daughters boyfriends know in advance..... That they are NOT allowed to address me by my first name. It will always be Mr. My Last Name. Period no discussion on this rule. No fist bumps or bro hugs either. The handshake works well in this situation.

I have taken many many and I mean many of my daughters boyfriends boating with us. I can’t think of a better way to cut through the BS, than spending a fun filled day of water sports. Some of these gentlemen I truly admired and wish my daughter had not dumped them, but heck, you can only control so much. Boating really is a great way to know your kids friends!!

So dads with daughters.... read below

My one daughter.... I caught her and her boyfriend doing the dirty deed, red handed, when she was 17, and what happened next was nothing like I had imagined all those times cleaning my gun.... The young man looked like he had just ran a marathon, just dripping in sweat! My daughter looked worse lol. When the young man, who had been on my boat at least 20 times and had gotten to the point where he felt at home raiding my fridge, saw me.... He began hyperventilating so uncontrollably, that at some point I remember putting my arm around him to hold him up while I was saying..... Just breeth Tom, Take a deep breath Tom, relax Tom, stop shaking Tom. Then I spent the next 2 hours giving the birth control speech I had been preparing for 17 years! I remember telling my wife later..... At least I won’t have to worry about that anymore.




breath tom, relax tom, stop shaking tom! but he couldnt hear me with the pillow over his head!
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Old 02-12-2019, 12:37 PM
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Originally Posted by Barrington View Post
Here has what has worked very well in my household: (or maybe not so well if you read below)

My daughters boyfriends know in advance..... That they are NOT allowed to address me by my first name. It will always be Mr. My Last Name. Period no discussion on this rule. No fist bumps or bro hugs either. The handshake works well in this situation.

I have taken many many and I mean many of my daughters boyfriends boating with us. I can’t think of a better way to cut through the BS, than spending a fun filled day of water sports. Some of these gentlemen I truly admired and wish my daughter had not dumped them, but heck, you can only control so much. Boating really is a great way to know your kids friends!!

So dads with daughters.... read below

My one daughter.... I caught her and her boyfriend doing the dirty deed, red handed, when she was 17, and what happened next was nothing like I had imagined all those times cleaning my gun.... The young man looked like he had just ran a marathon, just dripping in sweat! My daughter looked worse lol. When the young man, who had been on my boat at least 20 times and had gotten to the point where he felt at home raiding my fridge, saw me.... He began hyperventilating so uncontrollably, that at some point I remember putting my arm around him to hold him up while I was saying..... Just breeth Tom, Take a deep breath Tom, relax Tom, stop shaking Tom. Then I spent the next 2 hours giving the birth control speech I had been preparing for 17 years! I remember telling my wife later..... At least I won’t have to worry about that anymore.





yo B! yo daughter looks fly as hell, let me hit that! is not an acceptable way to approach you?
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Old 02-12-2019, 12:39 PM
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Originally Posted by Barrington View Post
Here has what has worked very well in my household: (or maybe not so well if you read below)

My daughters boyfriends know in advance..... That they are NOT allowed to address me by my first name. It will always be Mr. My Last Name. Period no discussion on this rule. No fist bumps or bro hugs either. The handshake works well in this situation.

I have taken many many and I mean many of my daughters boyfriends boating with us. I can’t think of a better way to cut through the BS, than spending a fun filled day of water sports. Some of these gentlemen I truly admired and wish my daughter had not dumped them, but heck, you can only control so much. Boating really is a great way to know your kids friends!!

So dads with daughters.... read below

My one daughter.... I caught her and her boyfriend doing the dirty deed, red handed, when she was 17, and what happened next was nothing like I had imagined all those times cleaning my gun.... The young man looked like he had just ran a marathon, just dripping in sweat! My daughter looked worse lol. When the young man, who had been on my boat at least 20 times and had gotten to the point where he felt at home raiding my fridge, saw me.... He began hyperventilating so uncontrollably, that at some point I remember putting my arm around him to hold him up while I was saying..... Just breeth Tom, Take a deep breath Tom, relax Tom, stop shaking Tom. Then I spent the next 2 hours giving the birth control speech I had been preparing for 17 years! I remember telling my wife later..... At least I won’t have to worry about that anymore.




did you at least let the poor guy finish. Sex talk with her dad had to be awkward enough. No need to throw blue balls into the mix.
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Old 02-12-2019, 12:42 PM
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How many other guys with a boner have you discussed sex with?
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Old 02-12-2019, 01:01 PM
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did he still have a boner during the talk? or had it subsided? did you let them get dressed first?


if they were all hot and sweaty, sounds like ol tom was going to pound town on a one way ticket!
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Old 02-12-2019, 01:04 PM
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Originally Posted by barrell View Post
I told my two daughters everyday of their life "All men are Pigs"

Tell mine the same and that the only want 1 thing

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Old 02-12-2019, 02:09 PM
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Originally Posted by autobaun70 View Post


did you at least let the poor guy finish. Sex talk with her dad had to be awkward enough. No need to throw blue balls into the mix.
It already looked like I had them caught just before the round four bell.

This event happened more than 10 years ago, and my wife and I have had many laugh over it too! There are so many funny witty things that I thought of later that I wish I had thought of then..... Hey Tom, are you looking to “buy” or just shopping?

So I have to ad this to the story which makes it even funnier. Tom went on to be a professional athlete. At least 6 times I have seen him in an ESPN locker room interview, where he is just as sweaty as the time with my daughter. The very first time..... my wife looks over at me and ask me if that is what Tom looked like that day? And we bust out laughing.

So here is the truth.... I wish I did not catch them. It was extremely awkward for all parties. Nothing like I had ever imagined the situation, while cleaning my gun for 17 years, contemplating the poor fate of the young dickwad that thought he was going to deflower my little princess. Lol That could not have been any further from what actually happened. I still see Tom every now and then and truly wish him the best. Here is how I feel today..... My daughters sex lives are none of my business.
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Old 02-12-2019, 02:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Rolandt03 View Post


if they were all hot and sweaty, sounds like ol tom was going to pound town on a one way ticket!

Ya...think? He was the mayor of pound town!



To answer your your question on letting them get dressed.... Tom was so unbelievably shocked to see me, his legs stopped working. No kidding. He was completely overcome with shock and fright. I was able to get an earlier flight home and was dead tired when I flung open the front door of my home, only to completely catch the two culprits in the living room, with their clothes nowhere to be seen. I instantly knew that being any kind of a dick was only going to make a bad situation worse. I am not kidding, he was starting to convulse. My daughter ran off naked down a hall leaving poor Tom all on his own with me. My wife was quite proud of how I handled the situation. I just wish it was her and not me. As I remember, at some point, I did give him a pink hunny bunny towel to cover himself with.

This is is funny.... walking into the front door of my home never felt the same afterwards. Just saying
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