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Epic gift fails for wife

Old 11-28-2018, 03:40 PM
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Default Epic gift fails for wife

The instapot thread got me thinking, and as a public service though it would be good to give real life examples of really bad gift ideas for wife that you have done. Me first...

Early in our marriage I was looking for something unique that I thought she would appreciate. I had a dog, she had a cat and she really hated cleaning the litter box (her job, not mine). In my search I focused on a "seen on TV" automatic litter box. I was pricey, over a hundred bucks I think. Lets just say the look on her face wasn't what I hoped nor expected. I was trying to make her life easier on a task she hated, and failed. Her dad was happy though, it got him out of last place from the time he got his wife a vacuum. FYI, they don't work well, unit was in the trash in 3 months.
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Old 11-28-2018, 03:44 PM
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I got mine an anchor ball one year.
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Old 11-28-2018, 03:51 PM
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An inflatable life vest.

I guess I shouldn't have "accidentally" called her Natalie.
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Old 11-28-2018, 03:52 PM
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A 19 year old nanny.
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Old 11-28-2018, 03:53 PM
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My first wife: a membership to weightwatchers, single a year later, what a relief
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Old 11-28-2018, 04:21 PM
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cookbook; newly married.
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Old 11-28-2018, 04:21 PM
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Cold air intake for her suburban. Installed it while she was gone. It sounded really good...........not so much.
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Old 11-28-2018, 04:28 PM
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For their anniversary my buddy gave his wife a grass catcher for the lawnmower. Yeah, they’re divorced.
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Old 11-28-2018, 04:32 PM
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I bought her a greeting card for Valentine's Day and she read the card and got a big grin on her face. She asked "You read this card before you picked it?". I respond "Of course honey, you know how I spend a lot of time to get the perfect card." She hands me the card and tells me to read the it all the way to the end so I started reading and then just busted out laughing. The last line said "To a wonderful husband." Oh crap I got caught! I just fessed up and told her that the shit written in the card aren't my words so I just kind of skim over the wording. Now I read the WHOLE card.
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Old 11-28-2018, 04:57 PM
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Ten years ago I bought my wife a fur coat from my business partners mother 500 bucks ( first clue ). When she brought it to me it was wrapped in a box I nice Christmas paper ( second clue ) well on Christmas Eve with family members around I give it to her. It was the nastiest looking raccoon coat I have ever seen. The back looked like the raccoons died of mange The day after Christmas I was at the fur store buying her a new full length coat
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Old 11-28-2018, 05:07 PM
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Originally Posted by 04keywest1720 View Post
A 19 year old nanny.
are you sure it was for her?
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Old 11-28-2018, 05:10 PM
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We just take a weekend getaway to somewhere with great food, drinks, and a spa. Do a couples massage once. She gets several more massages. I go do something or sit at the bar. Eat good meals, do fun things.
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Old 11-28-2018, 05:11 PM
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I gave The Warden a PS2, thinking she might like it for the Netflix installed.

She didn't.

One of the sons loved it.
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Old 11-28-2018, 05:40 PM
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Originally Posted by r_ventura_23 View Post
pic of wife?
is your screen heat rated?
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Old 11-28-2018, 05:44 PM
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My partner bought his wife a rifle and scope one Christmas. He got a nice sewing machine the next year. They're still married.
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Old 11-28-2018, 06:13 PM
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I hate the gift giving thing. Don't ever know what to get her. So I usually don't and tell her let's just call it even. Sometimes it works, like this year we're buying a house and are probably going to spend much more than I want so we won't get anything for each other for the holidays.
Once in awhile I give her something good usually every few yrs a nice piece of jewelry or something.

Gifts are her dept, my dept is cards I get all the bday and holiday cards.
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Old 11-28-2018, 06:36 PM
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With only her semi-approval, I brought home a 100lb golden retriever around Thanksgiving. For Christmas that year I got her a Rhumba vacuum. Did not go over well but at least I had a dog to keep me company. RIP Hank.

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Old 11-28-2018, 06:38 PM
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This is gonna date me.
And it's actually not a fail. At least not on my part.
I bought my girlfriend an 8 Track tape player.
For my car.
She did become my wife.
And luckily for me, not too long later, she became my ex.
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Old 11-28-2018, 06:43 PM
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Compound radial arm saw

She appreciated the gift; in fact, she went on to get me a lovely tanzanite ring when we went to the Caribbean. Since it was too small for me, she kept it. Oddly enough, it was a perfect fit for her.
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Old 11-28-2018, 06:44 PM
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Bought mine a cast iron skillet one year for her birthday.
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