View Poll Results: How do you handle finances in your relationship?
1 Pot - everything combined
2 Pots - separate accounts, bills/expenses divided in some sort of ratio
3 Pots - Individual Accts and a JT Acct
Voters: 412. You may not vote on this poll

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Couples Finances Poll

Old 05-15-2018, 01:08 PM
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Originally Posted by Wolakrab View Post
In all of my marriages(more than one), I have found that separate accounts, with expenses split(not necessarily 50-50) worked best. Joint accounts never worked...and one person paying all the bills didn't either. Those arrangements always ended up in disagreements...especially if I bought something for the boat...
ummmm doesn't sound like any of your plans work.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:10 PM
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Two separate earners, two separate accounts, she has her set of bills, I pay the mortgage and boat slip and boat related bills. We each pay our own vehicles...etc. We try to split everything else down the middle as closely as possible (even boat purchases and purchases for the boat). I did not setup this agreement, it is the way she wanted it. She has a great career and makes good money. She was a very independent woman when I met her, which is one of the big things that attracted me to her. No reason for me to try to change her, this setup is what was comfortable to her and I was good with it. Some months she pays more (yearly insurances due), some months I pay more, but I feel like it's pretty close to even in the long run.

There is no right answer to this question. Just talk it out and figure out what arrangement is most comfortable to both of you. I'd be good with pretty much everything everybody above has stated. No matter the arrangement the big key is trust. I know she's not going out and spending on crazy stuff, but even if she did, it's her money to do such with, and neither am I (well... except for the occasional hunting/fishing related item lol).

Last edited by rustybucket; 05-15-2018 at 01:22 PM.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:14 PM
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considering the wife is retiring this month...I'd say one.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:14 PM
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Everything is joint, we are comfortable enough that if we want something we just go out and buy it. I do keep "goal" money for certain items like guitars and amps. If I didn't limit myself I could easily fill a room with the stuff.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:14 PM
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We both have out own "savings accounts" that we had coming into the marriage. Same thing for brokerage accounts. We have a joint checking that we both pay bills out of. I make about 3x what she does so she asks me on bigger purchases first but I dont really ask her when I want something unless its real type thing, but ultimately it is up to me when it comes down to it when I think about it.

First wife we kept everything separate and it turned into hearing her "I'm out of money can you put some in my account?" every month. So its easier this way for us.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:18 PM
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Been married 20 years, one pot. Before we spend real money (anything over $100) we talk about it with the other. Both of us work and my background is the Beaver Cleaver family with only my Dad working outside the home, and both my Mom and Dad had equal access to everything. Looking back with the three boys I think he had the easy end of the bargain.

If not married would keep everything separate, including ownership of any purchase. Too easy to have one of you flake out and skip town.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:26 PM
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Married 17 years this month. We started with the 3 (hers, mine, ours) and migrated to a single account by year 5. We are both self employed in the same business, there is no separation of money at home or at work. I joke with my friends, if she ever leaves me, I might get half back as I have nothing now!
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:32 PM
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2 pots. One is the household account which we pay bills out of and I spend out of and she has an allowance account.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:35 PM
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Everything goes into one account. Wife takes cares of bills etc, generally buy what we want, if its more than $500 bucks or so we let each other know. Married 10 years, no problems.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:37 PM
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I have two accounts that I keep her money in.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:40 PM
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One account that my wife knows about

And she does not have access to it.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted by spraynet 1 View Post
If acct
engaged...... start moving twoards one acct
dating...........your nuts if one acct.

Seriously, marriage is by definition the combining of two individuals that now work, love, play as one! One account!
Trust is everything, don't have that then you really don't have a marriage either!!!
Tried that twice and it cost me thousands and years to dig out. One checking that i pay all the bills from and debit card i let her use on occasion, will never trust her again with money.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:42 PM
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All combined. I do it all. I'm not even sure she knows who we bank with. She spends less than she makes, so I'm good with it.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:44 PM
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Not married yet but can't you detail this in the prenup?
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:45 PM
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You guys are seriously going to let me vote in this? LOL, suffice to say, I have tried every which way :

1. Joint account, none other - nope she wrote checks without ever having a clue what was in there - Wife #1
2. Joint account - each with separate account, but most of our money in the joint account - Wife #2
3. Started with separate accounts, after we got married we got a joint account, only a little bit of my $$ went into Joint account, none of hers. Wife #3

It matters more what the moral fiber of you partner is
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:53 PM
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We have three main accounts, mine, hers and ours. We both deposit money in the joint account every paycheck. This pays for vacations and anything else we both want to spend money on. But both of us have to agree on it. She pays most of the bills and I give her money every pay period to help with my share. But we could never have one account we both run our accounts down to pennies before payday. Soon as I get paid I pay her, fund the joint account and put money in savings. Not too mention I like to break out my money into multiple accounts for different priorities and couldn't do that with one account.
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Old 05-15-2018, 01:55 PM
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Originally Posted by Barefoot View Post
Married 37 years, always had joint accounts.
23 years married, we both work and can't imagine it any other way. We combined before we got married since we were living together. The only things separate are the IRA's.

Go ahead and flame me... but honestly I feel like separating money is a way of not fully committing to the union.
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Old 05-15-2018, 02:03 PM
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We have a number of different accounts, some joint. But in reality it doesn’t matter because if we’re on the outs in Maryland she’s getting half. That said, my money funds them all as her job is taking care of the kids and the house. But she isn’t a big spender and doesn’t even know the ATM pin.
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Old 05-15-2018, 02:09 PM
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Each have own checking and savings accts and separate IRAs and other investments. I pay all the bills except grocery and gifts and eating out and heating oil We are a joint property state - Everyhting is 50 50. But we are in the process of adding beneficiaries and putting both names on all accounts for probate purposes.
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Old 05-15-2018, 02:12 PM
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One account and she has control, I get weekly pocket money.
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