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Stress - how do you deal with it?

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Stress - how do you deal with it?

Old 04-09-2014, 08:38 AM
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Default Stress - how do you deal with it?

I am usually pretty good at dealing with stress via exercise, and regular outlets but lately it's been harder and I think its affecting my sleep and causing headaches.

Since September I've gotten divorced, moved, dealt with huge lay offs at work, taken on responsibilities that I'm clueless about, and just yesterday I had a 4.5 hour interview that was intense for a job that would require me to move about 2 hours up the coast....

My mind is racing and I can't focus! I'm stressed out!
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:40 AM
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hookers and blow.
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:44 AM
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I'm in the same boat Danny. I'm curious to see how some of these older wiser guys on here deal with this, because I'm struggling.
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:46 AM
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Weed.

Seriously, s l o w d o w n.

Separate what you can control and what you cannot. Having never been through a divorce, I don't know what I'm talking about, but I would think I wouldn't want to make a bunch of huge changes right after it happened. Some sense of "normalcy" would be good, I would think. Sure, your job has changed, but you can adapt. Truth is, if you take the new gig, you'll probably have more work and more adapting to do, and you won't have any of your prior work history and relationships to lean on.

Edit as Snook got in there. Go fishing with Snookered.
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:49 AM
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I drink
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:52 AM
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Originally Posted by Joe View Post
hookers and blow.
I've purposely avoided this route. I've been really laying low compared to how I usually am.
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:57 AM
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I know what you mean Danny....I started going to the gym 3-4 days a week. It seems to help ease my mind and keep me focused on what I can control.
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:59 AM
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Humor... I try to look at the light side of things
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Old 04-09-2014, 08:59 AM
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Kush and lift weights.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:00 AM
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I'm in the same situation. My stress level right now is way beyond anything most people experience. I went to the gym last night and it helped. Even some good looking women to look at.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:00 AM
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I simply stopped giving a crap about anything, worked wonders.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:01 AM
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Danny, I am facing some of the same issues as you. Throw on top of that raising 4 kids and wife moved out (that's a whole story within itself). Exercise is the only thing for me. Last year I ran 3 marathons, 3 half marathons, 3 10 plus milers and some 10k's. My knees are killing me now! I feel like Forrest Gump. Good luck to you. Stress surely is a killer.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:13 AM
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Get out on the water and have a few cocktails, good luck with that interview.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:19 AM
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Originally Posted by Danny33486 View Post
I am usually pretty good at dealing with stress via exercise, and regular outlets but lately it's been harder and I think its affecting my sleep and causing headaches.

Since September I've gotten divorced, moved, dealt with huge lay offs at work, taken on responsibilities that I'm clueless about, and just yesterday I had a 4.5 hour interview that was intense for a job that would require me to move about 2 hours up the coast....

My mind is racing and I can't focus! I'm stressed out!
Positivity?

Got divorced = unsaddled from someone I was incompatible with
Huge layoffs = I am valuable and survived the lay offs
New responsibilities = opportunity to learn and enhance my resume
interview = I may have some choices...beats having NO choices

On top of managing negativity, proper breathing.

Stress is a chemical reaction leading to physiological changes.
These are mitigated with deliberate deep breathing.

Finally....human touch.
This stupid board is no substitute for honest interaction with living human beings.

Good luck.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:25 AM
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Originally Posted by Danny33486 View Post
I am usually pretty good at dealing with stress via exercise, and regular outlets but lately it's been harder and I think its affecting my sleep and causing headaches.

Since September I've gotten divorced, moved, dealt with huge lay offs at work, taken on responsibilities that I'm clueless about, and just yesterday I had a 4.5 hour interview that was intense for a job that would require me to move about 2 hours up the coast....

My mind is racing and I can't focus! I'm stressed out!
Work out harder and longer than you normally do. I've added cardio to the end of my workout and have been exhausted and my stress melts away. And whatever you're worrying about...just know worrying has zero benefit.

Oh and you already know (I think), find one of your buddies with some good bud and take a pull or 4 AFTER your workout. You can thank me later. No seriously, you can thank me later.

Edit: And keep your chin up man.

Last edited by swifty; 04-09-2014 at 09:25 AM. Reason: .
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:27 AM
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Originally Posted by chrispnet View Post
.......

Finally....human touch.
This stupid board is no substitute for honest interaction with living human beings.

Good luck.
Agree with your last statement 1000%. Find one of your female friends to just hang out with. I did this recently and gave me a whole new perspective. And it doesn't have to be about a booty call....but that helps too.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:29 AM
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Danny you need a Bahamavention.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:32 AM
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i pray a lot
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:37 AM
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Give kava-kava a try. Something you can do at work that helps take the edge off just a little.
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Old 04-09-2014, 09:38 AM
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Stress manifests itself in many ways and is harmful both emotionally and physically.

One thing to appreciate that unless you are being directly acted upon by an outside force that is causing an instant an immediate threat, you are not under a physically stressful conditions...that does not mean however, that your body is not under physical stress from an internal condition that you have created with your mind.

The stress we put ourselves under is usually a combination of many things but the two major culprits are time constraints and failure fears.

What if I don't finish on time, what if I don't have enough money to do that, what if I lose the house, my job, my self-esteem, what if I have to start from zero....these are all, thankfully, inside your head.

For example, jump out of an airplane (with a parachute) and you will forget all of the stressors in your head. How is that possible? Nothing has changed. The things that are bearing down pressure upon you have not changed. But the stress has gone. It is because you have to consciously manifest the stress for it to be real, this is hard to do when you are hurtling toward the earth.

So, in short, de-manifest it.

Picture yourself floating high above the earth and you have a fast forward and a rewind button. You can see the blue marble spinning below you. Rewind the earth a few hundred years and let it play...you can watch the rise and fall of empires, whole armies marching only to be pushed back, buildings erected and then eroded with time. People living and every person dying. The Emperor holds the same status as the errand boy for the rest of time. None of the silly games they play mean anything in the grand scheme of things. The most important men and women of any era are spoken of very rarely and even if they are, what does that get them? Nothing. Did they have stress and problems? Most definitely. Where are those problems now? What did the worry achieve for them? The ultimate thing to realize that nothing really matters aside from being good to your community and leaving the earth better for having known you. The rest is just filler.

Now fast forward looking at the earth. All the new things that will come to be. Things you will never see, people you will never know. In fact, everyone you do know will die. They will be consumed by the earth and subsumed into organisms anew. New people. You, me, the dog, that tree will all reform into something else. That's cool and weird at the same time.

This is the way of the world. All organisms alive right now are composed of atoms that were once something else. That's right. Your mother ate food and rearranged those atoms to form you. You will die and your atoms will be scattered back into the earth only to be formed into something new.

We have to live in the moment constantly. There is no future as it has yet to be written and therefore doesn't exist. The past is confined to history. Never to change. The only thing you can act upon is the "right now".

So, I guess most things that stress us out are something that "may happen" if a certain set of circumstances come to be...well, that is a moment that is yet to happen. You can't act in that moment until it arrives, so why worry about how you will act when that moment arrives?

Do you trust yourself? Do you think you make basically sound decisions? If so, why would you lose this ability whenever a new challenge presents itself? You won't. You'll keep on getting on, just like you always have. It may well be an order of magnitude better than life is today. Something to look forward to then. Sounds exciting to me. Can't wait to see what it's all about.

Today. Look at today. You will need to eat, shit, get some stuff done, laugh and then sleep. You can only do today's work today, not tomorrow's or next years.

Work out what you are doing today. Thank nature for providing you with the means to do that work today, work that only you can do and set about doing it. Do it well.

You have no stress for I know you can get your day done and you can get it done well.

Good luck Danny.

Last edited by Johnny Dreamer; 04-09-2014 at 09:54 AM.
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