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Puns

Old 07-09-2007, 12:49 PM
  #1  
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Default Puns

A compendium of puntifications (PUNS)
>
>
> 1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
>
> 2. Police were called to a daycare where a three-year-old was
> resisting a rest.
>
> 3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's
> all right now.
>
> 4. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
>
> 5. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
>
> 6. When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
>
> 7. A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
>
> 8. A thief fell and broke his leg in wet concrete. He became a
> hardened criminal.
>
> 9. Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.
>
> 10. We'll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.
>
> 11. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.
>
> 12. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on
> shaky ground.
>
> 13. The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
>
> 14. If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.
>
> 15. A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
>
> 16. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway
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Old 07-09-2007, 03:08 PM
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Default Re: Puns

I decline to participate......
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Old 07-09-2007, 03:41 PM
  #3  
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Default Re: Puns

A prostitute told me she would do anything I wanted for $50. I had her paint the house
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Old 07-09-2007, 07:10 PM
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Default Re: Puns

We sent a hooker to my grandfather's house. She told him she was paid to give him super sex.

After thinking about it a while he told her...













"I'll have the soup."
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Old 07-09-2007, 07:21 PM
  #5  
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Default RE: Puns

I would give my right arm to be Ambidextrous (sp)
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Old 07-09-2007, 08:09 PM
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Default RE: Puns

LuckyLaRue - 7/9/2007 8:21 PM
... Ambidextrous (sp)
Are you going through a bad spell?






(Ambidexterous, but I had to look it up.)
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Old 07-09-2007, 08:31 PM
  #7  
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Default Re: Puns

someone is pun..ishing us with this. You heard about the woman who backed into a fan..dissassedher..
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Old 07-09-2007, 09:05 PM
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Skinniest girl in the classroom, Anna Rexia.
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