Love life and problems
11-24-2019, 07:48 AM
#1
Love life and problems
I am not “me”
I am someone else on here. But no way am I going to put myself
I am married with 2 kids
I started a new job about a year ago and started to talk to a vendor I use
it was light and airy at first “hey I need something for this issue, can you help” or something along those lines.
Primarily text back and forth about work
I text her and took a shot and threw out a questionable text - something along the lines of “well I can come down to you , it’d be nice to get out of the office and see you especially “
well. Fast forward about a year.
Our FAMILIES are friends (they moved their boat to the marina I am at), I helped them sell their old boat. And assisted in buying a new boat.
arranged a lot of all that ..
we have hung out multiple times - but the 3 of us (her , I AND her husband)
the 3 of us have gotten together a lot love the year.
ejther after work, going away for a night to the boat alone etc. or even going out to dinner at the marina (with their family, and my family ). Put my wife and kids to bed and go over their boat and have some fun.
Gets even better - we both love each other.
I’ve thought about leaving my wife and kids but not fair to them at all (the kids) and she wouldn’t leave her family
I don’t know what to do. Just ride the wave I guess.
but. It’s deep and getting deeper.
and. No. No photos or names
I am someone else on here. But no way am I going to put myself
I am married with 2 kids
I started a new job about a year ago and started to talk to a vendor I use
it was light and airy at first “hey I need something for this issue, can you help” or something along those lines.
Primarily text back and forth about work
I text her and took a shot and threw out a questionable text - something along the lines of “well I can come down to you , it’d be nice to get out of the office and see you especially “
well. Fast forward about a year.
Our FAMILIES are friends (they moved their boat to the marina I am at), I helped them sell their old boat. And assisted in buying a new boat.
arranged a lot of all that ..
we have hung out multiple times - but the 3 of us (her , I AND her husband)
the 3 of us have gotten together a lot love the year.
ejther after work, going away for a night to the boat alone etc. or even going out to dinner at the marina (with their family, and my family ). Put my wife and kids to bed and go over their boat and have some fun.
Gets even better - we both love each other.
I’ve thought about leaving my wife and kids but not fair to them at all (the kids) and she wouldn’t leave her family
I don’t know what to do. Just ride the wave I guess.
but. It’s deep and getting deeper.
and. No. No photos or names
11-24-2019, 07:52 AM
#3
Senior Member
Stop now.... or risk guilt, pain, and suffering forever. 
even if you did stop now, it may be too late, but at least you'll have a chance at redemption possibly.
even if you did stop now, it may be too late, but at least you'll have a chance at redemption possibly.
11-24-2019, 07:55 AM
#4
Senior Member
The fantasy of it all sounds great, but you have to remember the "honeymoon" of it all will eventually wear off and you'll likely be in a similar situation as you are today.
The best thing is to move you focus back to your family completely. Do things with them, not without.
If the kids grow up, move out, and you and the wife have drifted apart, that's a different story then.
At least this is all what I would do bc I couldn't stand to not see my son every night.
The best thing is to move you focus back to your family completely. Do things with them, not without.
If the kids grow up, move out, and you and the wife have drifted apart, that's a different story then.
At least this is all what I would do bc I couldn't stand to not see my son every night.
11-24-2019, 08:17 AM
#6
Senior Member
If you're really serious about keeping your family together, I'd make a compete and total separation from the other couple.. or its gonna get ugly, sooner rather than later.
Its gonna be tough, sort of like a druggie trying to break his habit, if you don't change your peer group, you'll drift right back to the old habits......
Is your wife the forgiving type if she would find out?? or the type to fight till the end.... I predict some fight. Plus, your kids will be the ones to suffer in the end.
Its gonna be tough, sort of like a druggie trying to break his habit, if you don't change your peer group, you'll drift right back to the old habits......
Is your wife the forgiving type if she would find out?? or the type to fight till the end.... I predict some fight. Plus, your kids will be the ones to suffer in the end.
11-24-2019, 08:23 AM
#8
Senior Member
Interesting 1st post
11-24-2019, 08:23 AM
#9
Happens all the time. But for most people, once the mystery, sneaking around, the new VaJJ, and the honeymoon end, it’s back the normal grind. And in this case, the normal grind will be exponentially harder due to divorce, child placement, financial woes, etc.
At the end of the day, it’s your life, just take a step back and REALLY THINK IT THROUGH.
At the end of the day, it’s your life, just take a step back and REALLY THINK IT THROUGH.
11-24-2019, 08:25 AM
#10
I know the RIGHT thing to do.
but my heart now feels otherwise.
I guess it’s because I feel something when I talk and see and hang out w her.
I guess I feel needed and wanted and loved ...
her husband knows something is up w feelings, and feels threatened by me. But loves the friendship we have.
just last night we hung out and went to dinner (and that was it) and I went home.
wife doesn’t know I went w THEM... but knew I went out w friends from work
we (the 3 of us text) together. And then me and her text separately.
shit we’re good friends that MY WIFE invited them to my kids first birthday party out with our family !
ill continue to answer questions.
trust me. I know I am wrong 1000000%
but.....
but my heart now feels otherwise.
I guess it’s because I feel something when I talk and see and hang out w her.
I guess I feel needed and wanted and loved ...
her husband knows something is up w feelings, and feels threatened by me. But loves the friendship we have.
just last night we hung out and went to dinner (and that was it) and I went home.
wife doesn’t know I went w THEM... but knew I went out w friends from work
we (the 3 of us text) together. And then me and her text separately.
shit we’re good friends that MY WIFE invited them to my kids first birthday party out with our family !
ill continue to answer questions.
trust me. I know I am wrong 1000000%
but.....
11-24-2019, 08:26 AM
#12
Senior Member
Guess those vows you took mean nothing..... loyalty dedication and pride are sorely missed
11-24-2019, 08:30 AM
#13
Originally Posted by Lprizman
Guess those vows you took mean nothing..... loyalty dedication and pride are sorely missed
it kinda ended up in my lap ; literally.
they were in the lifestyle. Not anymore. But we still get together.
she only wants to be with me - and him ... and he says the same
11-24-2019, 08:32 AM
#15
Admirals Club 
Originally Posted by Unknown_user
I’ve been here for YEARS - with a different user name Lance
11-24-2019, 08:36 AM
#17
Senior Member
Originally Posted by Unknown_user
I know the RIGHT thing to do.
but my heart now feels otherwise.
I guess it’s because I feel something when I talk and see and hang out w her.
I guess I feel needed and wanted and loved ...
her husband knows something is up w feelings, and feels threatened by me. But loves the friendship we have.
just last night we hung out and went to dinner (and that was it) and I went home.
wife doesn’t know I went w THEM... but knew I went out w friends from work
we (the 3 of us text) together. And then me and her text separately.
shit we’re good friends that MY WIFE invited them to my kids first birthday party out with our family !
ill continue to answer questions.
trust me. I know I am wrong 1000000%
but.....
but my heart now feels otherwise.
I guess it’s because I feel something when I talk and see and hang out w her.
I guess I feel needed and wanted and loved ...
her husband knows something is up w feelings, and feels threatened by me. But loves the friendship we have.
just last night we hung out and went to dinner (and that was it) and I went home.
wife doesn’t know I went w THEM... but knew I went out w friends from work
we (the 3 of us text) together. And then me and her text separately.
shit we’re good friends that MY WIFE invited them to my kids first birthday party out with our family !
ill continue to answer questions.
trust me. I know I am wrong 1000000%
but.....
Have you asked if she would be willing to leave her husband to be with you? Probably not but wonder what her response would be? And even if she did would you want her as your wife? I'm sure there would be a lot of trust and respect in that relationship. Since you asked, I would say---- end it.
And you can be sure that this is true.
Originally Posted by xlr8ngn
You’re playing with nitroglycerin. If you have a good wife then you better cut it off. If you have a wife that is close to you she already senses what is happening.
11-24-2019, 08:40 AM
#18
Senior Member
It ain't worth it
end it
She may not be into you as you perceive
What if your wife, who is at home with your kids while your ****ing off, did this?
Cut the BULLSHIT, get your ass back in check
I say this with experience.....what you could potentially do to others is life altering and entirely unfair due to your selfishness
end it
She may not be into you as you perceive
What if your wife, who is at home with your kids while your ****ing off, did this?
Cut the BULLSHIT, get your ass back in check
I say this with experience.....what you could potentially do to others is life altering and entirely unfair due to your selfishness
