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Old 02-11-2019, 02:52 PM
  #57  
jdc
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Bangkok, Thailand / Bogue Banks, NC
Posts: 1,142
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First, good on you for a reply that was more polite than necessary to some of the comments you've received.

I would start with speaking to an attorney in Woodbury who does family law and/or juvenile/criminal. You will then get a more accurate answer to what her mother's options are. If nothing else this will give you more ammunition with the local PD. And of course you will be getting real TN legal advice (spoken as a lawyer formerly licensed in TN) rather than keyboard jockeys.

Terrible situation, and I don't feel qualified to give you parenting advice. But you need legal advice as well.

Good luck.

Originally Posted by aj06bolt12r View Post
Maybe this is not the best place to go for advice. But the police say there is nothing that can legally be done. I know for sure that there are plenty of lawyers and PO's that frequent this forum. Figured they might have some solid advice.

The girl is already on birth control. Took care of that immediately after catching them. Its gross that a 12yr old needs to be on birth control.

There is for sure a good chance that she is contacting the boy via a friends device at school. I brought it up to her mother after the first incident. I don't see any way of stopping preventing this. The good news here is that most of her friends are against the "relationship" She has had some rifts about this with her peers who can see that this is a terrible situation. She thinks she is in love, there is no reasoning with her.

"Generally be a better father" yeah I know this is the answer. But its a little late for that now. Her real dad is a drug addicted, no job, no license having lying waste of oxygen that now lives with his mother. No help or good example coming from him.

I am not going to marry the mother as a result of this situation. Our non marriage licence having relationship has been longer lasting and better than the majority of marriages that our friends and families have entered into and destroyed over these 10 years. I see no reason to copy it. The vast majority of marriages seem to fail. We don't need one to hold our relationship together. She is in agreement with me on this 100% If you think this is the answer to the situation we find ourselves in currently... I guess you can't help. Thanks for trying.

The dogs.... I'm honestly proud that they even barked. They are the most friendly animals on the planet, stranger or not. And one of them is a 110lb German Shepherd.

Become friends with the 12yr old in a good way. At this point I don't know how to do that. I'm not her "real dad". She will have no part of any conversation about the subject. The answer to literally every question is " I don't know". The answer to every statement is "okay" She is already fully punished, there is nothing left to take away from her. Do I reward her for her stubborn defiance at this point by doing nice things with her? I literally don't know.

At this point I am seriously worried about her safety. If this boy is willing to steal a car and drive an hour with no license and attempt to break into my house for the second time what else is he willing to do? He could easily make some attempt at apprehending her. That may have been what he was trying to do the other night. The 12yr old has no fear of him. Believes he would never harm her. Will not listen to reason regarding this. Hell she is 12 and thinks she is in love. There is no logic taking place here.

Short of chaining her to her bedpost I am at a loss. (child abuse) We live in Cannon County Tennessee. The local cops say there is nothing they can do with a minor other then return them to their parents because Cannon County has no Juvenile department or some such nonsense. The quote from the PD. "In cannon county a minor can literally get away with anything short of murder" So even if I catch this kid in my house and tie him up the cops will just take him back home. And probably charge me with some nonsense. Seriously. Its probably best that I didn't have my shoes tied tight enough, if I caught him and held him for the cops that's probably kidnapping for all I know.

Can I press charges on his mother somehow. Anyone have any advanced knowledge of the law regarding this subject?
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