Jeff,
This post may get tossed because I'm going to recommend another web site for you to find.
Your post makes it clear that you need more than can be posted here, no matter how many of us respond. You would be well advised to begin by taking a basic Boater Safety course by either your local Coast Guard Auxillary or Power Squadron. Your local West Marine or Boat US stores (located on the north end of San Diego, I'm sorry I can't tell you any more than that because I've only been to those two stores once) who may very well having information about the up comming courses.
There is a message board called All Coast and a large number of its memebers are in the San Diego area. They are very nice people and quite supportive of one another. You should go and introduce yourself. The are located at:
All Coast Sport Fishing Message Board
Get the basics down first before you venture off shore. Find out about towing insurance and how to contact the Coast Guard if you run into problems. Don't so much as leave the dock until you have a radio on the boat and you know how to use it. The USCG Auxillary or the Power Squadron will take care of you there.
Thom