Drive through ATM - The Hull Truth

Shag · 09-19-2005, 10:37 AM

DRIVE-THROUGH ATM"

A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank is
Installing new "Drive-through" teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this newfacility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts. After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the
machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the
Inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17.Write deposit amount in check register and place receipt in back of
checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand-bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
provided.

23. Give appropriate hand signal to irate male driver waiting behind
you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Re-dial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

Bailey Boat · 09-19-2005, 11:52 AM

Their from Venus, whatcha expect??????

evernic · 09-19-2005, 12:26 PM

Sounds about right...........hope we don't have any ...femi-nazis on here......Whew

ESVAAngler · 09-19-2005, 12:45 PM

Hope Jane dosn't rip y'all a new one.....nah she has a better sense of humor than that.

Hydro · 09-19-2005, 12:49 PM

That's a bunch of BS. There's no way a woman would hang up a cell phone in order to use an ATM.

evernic · 09-19-2005, 12:54 PM

Hydro...........WOW...........this is scary..........we agree on something else.....all in two weeks time..........whew

CJS · 09-19-2005, 01:21 PM

What about the part when she calls the husband to blame
him for her hitting the machine with the side view mirror?

broncobirdy · 09-19-2005, 04:20 PM

Yeah what about the aprt where she slams the door into the ATM because she pulled to close. "I don't know what happened to the door".........

Bruce W · 09-20-2005, 01:16 AM

Yep - RIGHT on the money!

There SHOULD be an "express ATM" for use by MEN ONLY!

Regards,

farmerjane · 09-21-2005, 11:37 AM

I don't wear makeup....

auguste · 09-21-2005, 11:47 AM

Quote:

farmerjane - 9/21/2005 11:37 AM I don't wear makeup....

I told you guys . . . she reads every post . . . be sexist and she will catch you . . . if not today, then tomorrow

farmerjane · 09-21-2005, 05:53 PM

Quote:

auguste - 9/21/2005 10:47 AM

Quote:

farmerjane - 9/21/2005 11:37 AM I don't wear makeup....

I told you guys . . . she reads every post . . . be sexist and she will catch you . . . if not today, then tomorrow

Just doin' my part for the females of the forum. Besides, SOMEONE has to keep you (old) guys on your toes!!!

That's why I love you all so ~

Tunadevil · 09-22-2005, 11:00 AM

I thought you were supposed to go to the cash machine for them.

FLScout172 · 09-22-2005, 05:00 PM

I am the cash machine for my wife