Lame "No-Catch" Rationalizations - Need More

[Enough Already]

After another long day of trolling, drifting and run/gun with NO fish to show for it this Saturday I simply ran out of one liners to lay on my guests and had to repeat myself. Instead of saying "I'm sorry, I don't know how to fish", I give em things like:

- You should have been with me the last time.

- Next time we'll hit a big school of dolphin and this skunk trip will be a distant memory.

- Its great to just be out on the water - what a beautiful day.

- Hey, this is better than (insert chore here).

- You know, we're really fortunate - I bet less than 1% of the world's population even gets to try fishing.

Of course they are all true but I need some fresh ideas (or some fish in the box). What are your favorites?

[Snapper Head]

"You people are amazingly bad luck, get the he!! out of my boat!"



Big Al

[boatommy]

Ya shoulda been here yesterday.
thom

[thunnus hunter]

Which one of you brought bananas on my boat?

[Hawkeye]

You aint holding your mouth right.

[gordo35]

Water is too muddy
Too much current

I used these yesterday

[FearNaut]

Diversion and puffery:

"I wonder what the poor people are doing today"

[Proline3250]

Have a few extra bis cards from your competitor and hand his out "tell your friends"

[snookerdude]

- Its great to just be out on the water - what a beautiful day.

I used this one a lot. "How'd you do????" "It was a BEAUTIFUL DAY ON THE WATER." eventually shortened to "BDW" which means "I didn't catch Jack."

[stvno]

Bad wind!

[cgrand]

"that's why they call it fishing & not catching"
"must be the full/new/crescent moon"
"wasn't any/too much water moving"
"who brought chips on the boat???"

[Tireless]

"I told you I suck at fishing before we left the dock.........and as you can tell right now, I wasn't lying"

"It isn't easy to actually catch fish when your crew is a bunch of idiots"

"This isn't a charter operation......you should have figured that out when I let you get onboard without swiping your credit card"

[fishie1]

"The sun was in my eyes"
"We were searching for the far more elusive 'larger' fish, anyone can catch small ones"
"Wind against the tide"
"Everytime I found a school some guy in a Bayliner rode right over them"
"This bait was fresh some time ago"
"The boat stays cleaner this way"
"Nobody in the entire fleet caught anything"
"Fish are outta season this year"
"Just be thankful we made it back to the dock"
"My GPS must be outta whack"
"Its George Bush's fault"

[wjherb]

"War on Terror"

[ReelAddiction001]

Bananas, always the bananas. Someone must have brought one on board!

[originalsin]

I doubt your clients are paying attention to wind direction.

"wind from the east, fish bite least"

[delmar]

"i'm sorry and here's your money back"

[don27dog]

I always find the fish. You could have at least put them on a school of bluefish ???

[Flot]

Glad I'm not the only one in Ft. Laud who can't catch a fish to save his life.

You can say what I do "This is the last g---amn fishing trip I am taking, next week we are going diving."

And then about a month later, repeat again.

[FireFly]

"The bite was unbelievable yesterday! I'll bet anything the fish are so full they don't even eat today"

Say that as you leave the dock so if you do catch something you'll look like a hero.