Famous Lines from the WORST brokers

auguste · 12-13-2009, 08:04 AM

Being an equal opportunity poster I am starting two posts . . . this one is about WORST brokers . . . the other thread about the BEST brokers and you can see that one by clicking here > > >

Famous Lines from the BEST Brokers

Here are the BS quotes I ran across during my very long search for a boat

#1 The boat was maintained with an open cheque book . . . well maybe, but the bank account was empty

#2 This fine vessel was restored by true craftsmen knowledgeable about wooden hulls . . . one of the worst retorations . . . paint and wax and no repairs to major structural problems

#3 Rock solid ride . . . boat will not fall apart as it slams over every 2 ft wave at 15 mph or faster

#4 Both engines had a complete rebuilt last year . . . one engine was blown, taken apart, and rusty pieces all over the place in the engine compartment . . . and the other engine was so rusty that it had not been taken apart in years

#5 The boat is perfect and shows just like the pictures in the add . . . an 11 year old boat, poorly maintained and needing major engine and transmission overhauls . . . the pics were taken 8 to 10 years before

What really pulled my chain was driving for 10 hours to see a boat that did not even resemble the boat being described by the broker or owner

Tell us about the BS stories brokers have given you

Mike Boehler · 12-13-2009, 08:07 AM

Let me know if your not interested, I got 4 people lined up to see her tomorrow!

captbone · 12-13-2009, 08:10 AM

32ft Boston Whaler twin 275hp Verados- After the warranty is up on those engines you can put a chip in them to make them 400hp each.

Rival1 · 12-13-2009, 09:15 AM

I was making some commments on the low freeboard on a big Topaz a couple years ago at the Boston boatshow, the salesman looked at me and said " I dont think I need to worry about it" implying that I was never going to be in the market for such a boat. I am young but not a dirtbag, pretty presumptious I thought.

rbhankins001 · 12-13-2009, 09:44 AM

"Just needs a little tlc"

DrJim · 12-13-2009, 11:00 AM

"Super fuel efficient power on this one"

{Translation: Underpowered}

RussH · 12-13-2009, 11:10 AM

The worst line ever was when I was looking at a Marathon boat in Port Clinton Ohio when I was about 25 years old. I asked the broker how much the boat weighed that I was interested in. He looked at me and said " I don't know but it's likely that you can't afford it anyway, let me show you something more in your price range!"

What a f'in a-hole the guy was. I ended up buying a larger more expensive Carver from a dealer down the street. The first thing I did when I picked the boat up was to pull it to this a-holes parking lot, went in and told him to check out the boat in the parking lot that I couldn't afford.

Russ

KeyPineSavage · 12-13-2009, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RussH

What a f'in a-hole the guy was. I ended up buying a larger more expensive Carver from a dealer down the street. The first thing I did when I picked the boat up was to pull it to this a-holes parking lot, went in and told him to check out the boat in the parking lot that I couldn't afford.

Russ

Now, THAT is beautiful!!

ABoater · 12-13-2009, 02:45 PM

I hate it when they say, "but it's an easy fix".

So then I ask:

Well, if it is so easy, why don't you have it fixed before you show it to a buyer???

I then get "the look"...

Local Motion · 12-13-2009, 03:00 PM

Every boat I ever looked at, be it big, small, underpowered or not... "Cruises at 35 knots".

jobowker · 12-13-2009, 06:00 PM

"I know it seems overpriced, but you get what you pay for."

overbuilt monster · 12-13-2009, 06:28 PM

All sun damaged, smoking, alcoholic boat brokers use catch phrases like those.

AlexisMarie · 12-13-2009, 06:38 PM

Back when I was about 21yrs young I was in a yamaha dealer looking at waverunners. There were 2 salesmens. One salesmen was busy with a customer so I approached the other one.(all along- Im wondering why I wasnt approached by him first). Just as I'm asking him about the waverunner another customer walked in the door and he told me "excuse me, I need to help paying customers first". WTF!! I then realized he misunderstood my dirty work clothes for being a dirtbag.
I couldnt resist- I interuppted the other salesmen- Dropped my amex on his desk and told him when your done I'd like to buy that waverunner over there. I told him his buddy was too busy to help me since he prefered to help paying customers instead. After walking out the door I told the a-hole never to judge a man by his clothing. He never uttered a word and im sure he learned a valuable lesson.
I felt like a million bucks.

capt_matt · 12-14-2009, 04:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AlexisMarie

Back when I was about 21yrs young I was in a yamaha dealer looking at waverunners. There were 2 salesmens. One salesmen was busy with a customer so I approached the other one.(all along- Im wondering why I wasnt approached by him first). Just as I'm asking him about the waverunner another customer walked in the door and he told me "excuse me, I need to help paying customers first". WTF!! I then realized he misunderstood my dirty work clothes for being a dirtbag.
I couldnt resist- I interuppted the other salesmen- Dropped my amex on his desk and told him when your done I'd like to buy that waverunner over there. I told him his buddy was too busy to help me since he prefered to help paying customers instead. After walking out the door I told the a-hole never to judge a man by his clothing. He never uttered a word and im sure he learned a valuable lesson.
I felt like a million bucks.

Maybe he was the one who had the upper hand? Never be so proud that you need to prove something to a boat salesman. They take advantage of it whenever they can.

AlexisMarie · 12-14-2009, 04:58 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by capt_matt

Maybe he was the one who had the upper hand? Never be so proud that you need to prove something to a boat salesman. They take advantage of it whenever they can.

I agree with you 100%. But being 21yrs old, pissed off and no mortgage to worry about, I couldnt resist. I was going to buy it anyway. If it was now, I simply would have told his manager to send his salesmen for training because he sucks and you just lost a sale. Im very picky where I spend my money these days.

Venture34 · 12-14-2009, 05:38 AM

I called on a 2003 boat that is berthed about an hour away and while inquiring the salesman asks if he "can call me back", however he fails to ask me my number, hence no returned call. BASIC STUFF!

Its probably a jerk move, but when I finally do buy the next boat I might send him a note saying perhaps you should have asked my number next time....

offshorebri · 12-14-2009, 05:53 AM

I was looking at a ten year old Rampage a few years ago and the salesmen told me all ten year old sportfishers have spider cracks and some fiberglass tabbing issues!!!!!

DFreedom · 12-14-2009, 05:57 AM

I went to college with a guy whose family owned several car dealerships. One of them was a Rolls dealership. A black guy walked in one day to look over a Corniche Convertible and asked a salesman how much. The salesman told the guy, "I think that's probably way out of your price range". Turned out the guy was a big time doctor from Atlanta. He bought the car from another salesman. I bet it hurt losing that commission.

hthoang · 12-14-2009, 06:43 AM

For every one of these "don't judge a book by its cover" stories, I'm sure there are a thousand broke tire kickers.

albiewhore23 · 12-14-2009, 07:17 AM

i always liked "oh you can polish that right out"